6 Women Share What They Did After Finding Out There Was A Side Chick

What would you do if you discovered your man was seeing someone else? Do you confront him directly, pack your things and walk away, or quietly deal with the other woman behind the scenes? For some Nigerian women, protecting their homes means handling the side chick in silence, without their partners ever finding out.

We spoke to a few women who shared the surprising — and sometimes extreme — ways they handled their husbands’ or boyfriends’ side chicks.

“My pastor revealed it to me first” — Ada, 42*
Ada says her first clue didn’t come from snooping or suspicion — it came from church.

“I was in my Pentecostal church when my pastor told me God had revealed that my husband was distracted by another woman. He said she was pulling him away from his family and warned me to be prayerful. He didn’t give me a name, so I started paying closer attention at home.

I watched his phone habits, his calls, and his movement. Eventually, I discovered it was a woman who worked at his office — a widow with two children.

Instead of confronting him like I wanted to, I followed my pastor’s counsel and went to meet her directly. At first, she pretended like she didn’t know what I was talking about. But when I laid out the evidence, she went quiet. I told her clearly that this was her only warning, and if she didn’t back off, she would face spiritual consequences.

After that, my husband’s attitude changed — he was restless, edgy, but never said a word to me. Weeks later, the woman disappeared from his life. Until today, he has no idea I was the one who handled it quietly.”

“I stalked her until it was too obvious” — Bimbo, 34*
Bimbo had been dating her boyfriend for years, and they were already talking about marriage. But when she discovered his side chick, she decided to deal with the girl instead of confronting him.

“My boyfriend had just gotten a good job, and I knew women would come after him. What annoyed me most was that the side chick knew me. She even followed me on Instagram.

I gathered her details and started showing up in her space. At her salon, her church, even the restaurant where she usually went with my man. The first time, she thought it was a coincidence. The second time, she looked unsettled. By the third time, she knew I was deliberately stalking her.

Soon after, my boyfriend started acting restless, like she had told him. But he never confronted me, and I never explained myself. I just made sure she knew she was being watched.

Not long after, she backed off. She disappeared completely. My boyfriend never raised the issue, but she got the message.”

“I told her mother” — Halima, 50*
Some women confront the side chick directly, but Halima chose a quieter route — one that involved family.

“My husband’s side chick was about 24. I wasn’t angry at first, I just felt insulted. When I saw her messages on his phone, I recognised her surname and traced her family through Facebook. That’s how I found her mother’s number.

One evening, I called her mother calmly and introduced myself as the wife of the man her daughter was involved with. I didn’t shout. I just explained the situation and said, ‘Please warn your daughter. She’s about to destroy my family.’

The woman was shocked. She apologised and even prayed for me. A week later, her daughter herself called me crying and apologising. I didn’t believe her sincerity, but I knew her mother had forced her to. She promised to cut things off with my husband.

I didn’t need to push further — the shame alone did the job. My husband assumed she just lost interest. He never knew I went through her family.”

“I turned myself into a side chick too” — Chioma, 28*
While most women try to chase off the other woman, Chioma decided to fight on her own terms.

“I was dating this returnee guy during NYSC. He was fine, flashy, and women were always around him. He used to say he came back to Nigeria for NYSC and to find a wife he’d take abroad. Honestly, I thought he’d be my ticket out.

Then I found out he was seeing another girl. My friends said they’d seen them at clubs. I was mad, but instead of fighting him or her directly, I decided to play smart. I found out the girl already had a boyfriend — and I went after him.

I got his contact through her socials and started chatting him up. It was harmless at first, then playful. Soon, he was the one chasing me. I dropped subtle hints about his girlfriend’s movements until he started doubting her.

Before long, she completely disappeared from my boyfriend’s life. She couldn’t juggle two men without getting caught. Did I feel bad? A little. But I wasn’t about to lose my investment because of her.

My boyfriend still has no idea. Till today, he thinks she just got bored. But I made sure she understood — if she touched my relationship, hers would collapse twice as fast.”

“I actually fought her in school” — Fola, 31*
Years later, Fola still cringes when she remembers how she fought another woman over a man in university.

“My boyfriend then was handsome and popular. Girls were always around him, but I thought I had him secured. Then I found out he was cheating with a girl two levels above me. I was boiling with rage.

One evening, I gathered three of my friends and we stormed her hostel. My heart was beating so fast, but my pride wouldn’t let me turn back. We confronted her in front of everyone, and before I knew it, blows started flying. We tore her clothes, trashed her room, and left feeling powerful.

But when reality set in, I realised how foolish I’d been. My boyfriend wasn’t even on campus that week. Somehow, he heard the gist and ignored me for weeks. When he came back, he was cold and said he’d leave me if I ever embarrassed him like that again.

We still dated a little longer, but the relationship was already dead. Looking back, I feel deep shame. If I could speak to my younger self, I’d tell her: ‘You’ll leave him anyway. Don’t waste your energy fighting for someone who isn’t yours.’”

“I catfished her with a burner line” — Aisha, 30*
Aisha says her method sounds wild now, but at the time, it felt like the smartest thing to do.

“One night, while checking my boyfriend’s phone, I found explicit chats with another woman. Nudes, voice notes, everything. I was furious, but instead of exploding, I quietly forwarded everything to myself.

For days, I sat on the evidence. Then I went out, bought a fresh SIM card, and anonymously messaged the girl. I sent her screenshots of her own pictures and wrote, ‘I know what you’re doing.’ She panicked immediately. She kept asking who I was, but I never replied. I destroyed the SIM that same night.

Days later, I checked my boyfriend’s phone again, and everything was wiped. Still, I wasn’t convinced. So I repeated the trick with another SIM — this time sending stronger words: ‘If you don’t stop, you’ll regret it.’

She replied that she was done with him and begged to be left alone. The relief I felt was indescribable.

My boyfriend never knew. Maybe he still cheats, I don’t know. But he’s far more careful now. And even though my plan sounds crazy, I don’t regret it.”