The only advice I could think of is that no one can really know how you feel. They can try, they can imagine but they can’t be in your shoes, they can’t see it the way you do. And you’ll do yourself a bigger favor if you stop trying to make them understand why you make the choices you make or why you do the things you do.
As long as your morality agrees with it then you don’t need anyones validation because right and wrong doesn’t come in black and white.